Thursday, March 23, 2006

Anchor

It is my security blanket, my safety net, my strength. Like an anchor, it holds me and binds me to one place. Restless pacing aside, I cannot move. The length of the room is the further est I can let myself go before the anticipation of its coming, and the despair at missing it, calls me back.
Eventually, over the days, I learn one simple fact. It does not come when I want it to; it comes when I least expect it. I learn to sit with serenity, and eventually to do other things in the time that I wait. I read, I work. I think, I dream. I live, it is true, because living does not stop even when one does not live that life to the fullest. I talk, I laugh, I cry. But always, amidst all chaos that surrounds me and the whirlpool that tries to pull my attention away, one corner of my mind and heart – even my soul – are keyed to that corner, that anchor.

I linger, knowing that the moment it comes, my heart will take a wild leap of joy, and I will go to receive it with more energy and enthusiasm than I have for anything else in my day … or night.

So I wait.

As time drags on, and there is no sign of it, I must admit my tolerance fades and patience grows thin. Yet I wait, patiently or impatiently, for it does not care. What does it wait for? It will humble me, and then it will come. Or will it?

I run full tilt towards it, this fixed point of my life, as my patience pays off.

The phone is ringing.

~*~*~*~

49 Comments:

Blogger Mach said...

Your anchor touched the bed of my heart. Captured feelings beautifully :D.

11:00 AM GMT-8  
Blogger Dreamcatcher said...

:D. My lifeline too :) What would we do without technology!

10:37 PM GMT-8  
Blogger Incognito said...

Anchored.


*sigh*

10:47 PM GMT-8  
Blogger the Monk said...

when did you write this?

2:30 AM GMT-8  
Blogger onmyowntrip said...

I agree when you want someone to call no one does .
The ringing of the phone is like a temple bell really it can be like a calming sound when you get those jitters .

3:00 AM GMT-8  
Blogger Camphor said...

Mach - Why, thank you. :)

DC - Indeed. Pine away, I'm sure. :D

incognito - Why the sigh?

Monk - If I remember correctly on Jan 9th or 10th. Dad wasn't in touch in between for a couple of days,and I'd gotten a landline number so that he could... Ouch, I should've mentioned. I haven't written anything new for a long long time. I remembered it now. :)

myowntrip - Oh, perhaps the bet bit is that wheny ou want it to call, and it does, finally... :D

3:32 AM GMT-8  
Blogger Weary Hag said...

This is lovely. You had me drawn in the entire time ... wondering about this anchor. VERY nice writing!

Thanks so much for stopping by The Outpost and leaving your footprint; that means a lot to me.

1:51 PM GMT-8  
Blogger haz said...

hey girl
beautifully wriiten again...n the phone i think it rings a lot these days!!

10:15 PM GMT-8  
Blogger haz said...

hey girl
beautifully wriiten again...n the phone i think it rings a lot these days!!

10:19 PM GMT-8  
Blogger Harish Suryanarayana said...

Well written , as always . Long time Camphor . How have you been ?

10:24 PM GMT-8  
Blogger Ashish Gupta said...

long time no see :(

9:40 PM GMT-8  
Blogger The Phoenix said...

Hehe...well written!

Sounds like the beginning of a new relationship - you've captured that initial restlessness pretty well.

11:38 AM GMT-8  
Blogger Camphor said...

Weary Hag - Thanks! It's a pleasure to be at the Outpost.

crashed - Thankie, girl. :) And I know it does ring a lot, what to do, what to do?

harish - Yeah, it has. Life's good, but slighta busy... Will catch up later, I hope... How's yours going?

asshish - maybe weekend after this one I'll be at home, therefore online. Me stuck at college. :(

phoenix - Yup, but sometimes even the oldest relationship holds that feeling of restlessness.

1:21 AM GMT-7  
Blogger sagaro said...

Woohoo... that was one helluva post. The poeple above, have said all that I wanted to ... so guess wudnt make a fool of myself reiterating them...

6:23 AM GMT-7  
Blogger Camphor said...

Reiteration is acceptable, especially when it is praise. ;)

4:11 AM GMT-7  
Blogger sagaro said...

Captured feelings beautifully
touched the bed of my heart
VERY nice writing!
well written!
Well written , as always.
beautifully wriiten again

:P

6:27 AM GMT-7  
Blogger The Individualist said...

Beautifully written. No two opinions about it. Well written. And made me want to guess it fast.. and I have to admit that I did. Can understand the impatience... Can I be presumptive and say, In love, who isn't impatient?

5:08 AM GMT-7  
Blogger Ashish Gupta said...

you didn't came :(
and now me stuck here with exams :((
Have them till 27th april... not free at least till 19th.. catch ya after that!

Now what happened to the muse again? :(

6:19 AM GMT-7  
Blogger Poornaa Venkatesan said...

Awww!
Phone call eh? LOL
I wait for smses. Apparently my neighbour hates me getting calls. She just can't stop staring at the balcony or crapping about it to mommy dear. So sms it is, for now -sadly.

6:05 AM GMT-7  
Blogger sagaro said...

@Poornaa:
Call ikke evlo build up na, I should go tell your arumai neighbour about the vodka matter... hehe

6:20 AM GMT-7  
Blogger Hellbrandt Grimm said...

Very well written. But it makes one wonder, is it that call, or something else? A wrong number maybe. Things such as these do indeed reduce one to something almost pitiable. Even to the point of being considered dangerous by some. But then we all wait. For that call..

My hat doffs yet again to the written words.

11:21 PM GMT-7  
Blogger J-O-S-H (My Bench !) said...

very well written...intresting posts... had a gr8 time reading ur posts...njoy!!

2:55 PM GMT-7  
Blogger The man in the box said...

I wonder how it applies to the mobile phone scenario where the wait is interrupted by an annoying ringtone of an even more annoying song.

5:00 AM GMT-7  
Blogger Simi said...

i can empathise with this piece (peace) totally!

6:15 AM GMT-7  
Blogger sagaro said...

Is the phone still ringing?

11:32 AM GMT-7  
Blogger Ashish Gupta said...

:-/

8:07 AM GMT-7  
Blogger Incognito said...

I dreamt abt u yesterday. Now dont aske me how. I just did. I knew u were camphor. Sitting right behind me in some random classroom.. in bombay..

Quite wierd..

Are u.. say abt.. 5'2/3 or something?

5:27 AM GMT-7  
Blogger MTT Publishing said...

I hope your patience was rewarded. Here's hoping things are going well for you. I'm moving to Phoenix at the end of the month. Hopefully I'll hear from you soon.

JP

7:33 PM GMT-7  
Blogger Shankar said...

went through some of your latest posts......great blog....when will you resume posting again?

9:25 AM GMT-7  
Blogger Ashish Gupta said...

I give up :(

9:14 PM GMT-7  
Blogger Incognito said...

Thou hast been tagged by moi! See my blog for more details :D

6:25 AM GMT-7  
Blogger sagaro said...

Spam:
There is a bloggers meet on 24th at 3:00 pm at Ascendas. Be there da. And if possible let the rest of ur blogging friends know about it. And even if you cant find time in your busy schedule please do post about it ;)

2:39 AM GMT-7  
Blogger Ashish Gupta said...

:-(

4:06 PM GMT-7  
Blogger The Solitary Reaper said...

when's the next post..or are you anchored a little too tightly to post something :P

9:13 PM GMT-7  
Blogger PRADEEP K. said...

hmmmm...

10:37 PM GMT-7  
Blogger The Individualist said...

I read this now. And was wondering- ahem wait, haven't I read this earlier?! Went above and read the date.
Well.
Not posting anymore?
Not the greatest question in the universe, is it? lol

11:27 AM GMT-7  
Blogger Ashish Gupta said...

:-L

=((

5:44 PM GMT-7  
Blogger MellowDrama said...

Your anchor remains elusive:) For a stranger who stumbled into your blog that is. Nice! Cheers

4:45 AM GMT-7  
Blogger Srihari said...

A ship that is anchored stays put. A blimp that is anchored does not.

3:29 PM GMT-7  
Blogger Ashish Gupta said...

:-/

5:48 PM GMT-7  
Blogger tangled said...

Oh, wonderful. Running full tilt is so evocative isn't it?

P.S. Tell me you didn't like Pullman? He palled on me, rather. But Daddy Long Legs is a gem. :) Such happiness.

9:35 PM GMT-7  
Blogger Erimentha said...

Lovely, it is!

10:21 PM GMT-7  
Blogger jerry said...

that sounded a bit lost...

12:57 AM GMT-7  
Blogger Sowmya Rao said...

I came here from Tharunya's blog,

but OMG...

DLL is the book I want my like to be like.
DLL is what I read after every stressful event.
DLL is my bible against men.

"They purr if you rub them the right way and spit if you dont. That isn't a very elegant metaphor. I mean it figuratively."

Hello you. BE friends do.

7:29 AM GMT-7  
Blogger tangled said...

Many friends = good
:)

5:34 PM GMT-7  
Blogger sink sink socks said...

The boat bounded, and plunged, and frequently struck the grassybank of the canal, as if it sexmoviefree would break itself to pieces.

10:23 AM GMT-7  
Blogger Ashish Gupta said...

:-(

6:54 AM GMT-8  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

:( Missing you.

5:35 AM GMT-8  
Blogger PRADEEP K. said...

Are you ever coming back?

7:06 AM GMT-8  

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